Just got a letter from the child support agency saying
"you are no longer required to pay child support as the amount of time the other party cares for the child is not enough to recieve it"
You know how much I was paying? $27 a month yep thats it $6.75 per week and you know why I only pay that much my X makes $43,600 a year and I've been paying him!
Hows that huh. Not bad is it, heres him the first thing he does when I leave is not look for me oh no the first thing he does is arrange his "payments" his benefits, he not only makes that much every year but gets his "welfare" cheque and child support from me.
Notice how it says "time" thats because he's working 6 and 1/2 days a week the kids would be lucky if they see him at all, you know though if I had them it would be like getting blood from a stone getting payments from him, the agency would have to take it and then I know he would cry poor.
His payments where the FIRST thing he organized he was down the Centerlink (welfare office) before he even tried looking for me and really $6.75 a week from me might sound so very small and I don't really mind paying it as they are my kids after all but really it has been rather silly
The system here is set up to catch deadbeat parents who don't/won't pay, most of the literature I've recieved is aimed at fathers as well, most of it assumes that the caring parent is female
the letter I recieved today even spelled my name as the male version they assume as I'm the "paying" parent I'm male
I been paying my child support as little as it is there are many, many parents who don't pay out anything at all male and female and it does make me slightly miffed that one he makes so much every year and I've been paying him and two the system assumes that paying parents are all male
I don't see my kids, haven't seen them in 4 years the child support agency only wants money it doesn't care about visitations and the like doesn't care if you don't see your kids as long as you pay, even if you are paying some one who makes 10 times the amount as you it doesn't matter.
I know to my X it will matter though but he's not getting any more money out of me.
He actually owes me, owes me more much more than I've been paying out in child support for the last 4 years he wouldn't have a roof on the house I paid for that, I also paid the morgage every month out of my own wages when we first got a house .. he owes me and I've been paying him $6.75 a week for child support
Thursday, June 14, 2007
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7 comments:
The legal system is pathetic, Missy! I know others in situations similar to yours, where they are paying support to the large income earner and barely getting by on what they have. I relate to your sentiment about how much he really owes you... it's not the money, it's about what is fair and right. Well fine, save up your $27 each month and do something fun with it at the end of the year. How old are your kids? It must be very hard to never get to see them. I imagine you reach a point where you just come to terms with it, but it makes me sad for you though.
My kids are 17 and 19 now
In a way it's fair I pay others pay so I should as well but gee that amount really is silly.
Thing is though if it was the other way around he really would be struggling .. poor guy waa waa [/sarcasm]
Yes, Missy, I think men focus more on the dollar sign issue,for them it's all about winning or losing. Women tend to be more practical. I hope as your kids get out on their own they start comin back to visit their mom. In time I know they will!
In Sweden the system is a little different. Each month people with kids get a certain amount for each kid they have... no matter if they are millionaires many times over. That's one thing.
If the parents are separated/divorced one has to pay to the one who has custody. The amount is calculated based on both parts..but there's a max. amount. If the paying part cannot pay at all (unemployment etc.) the Gvt. steps in so that the other one gets the right amount anyways..
same here I've been paying him the tiny bit and the Gov has been paying the rest but he doesn't get much anyway as its on a sliding scale
I'm assuming that his benefits have gone down as well
Realy though it wasn't the paying part that irked me it was the fact he organized his benefits FIRST before he even bothered trying to call me/look for me
I don't mind paying in fact I should there are too many who don't pay anything at all .. I know he wouldn't have or tried not to anyway, there really isn't an easy way around not paying not here
I hear what you are saying, Missy, what is hurting is the fact that he didn't care enough to come find you, the first thing he thought of was the money. Doesn't that just reaffirm your decision that you needed to leave? Sometimes the people we loved, or tried to love, didn't bother to love us enough. It's hard to get over that kind of rejection, I know. But from everything you have written, I think you are much better off now. Are you ever sorry you left him?
I find it funny that when you left all he wanted is money and all he got was $27 a month. What does he do with it? Go to dinner? Get a tank of gas? I mean really, what help can that possibly be? Was it even worth filing the paperwork for?
Be glad you are done with it. I'm sure he owes you so much, and you know your children are worth so much more than money. But that's all he saw them as, an opportunity to get money out of you. That's just wrong...
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